3 places your mind cannot find rest

Recharging our mental batteries is necessary for everyday performance and longevity. Every now and then we need to escape our day-to-day and get into something different to refresh us. For some this is a vacation or trip. Others it’s a day off with a book. For me, it’s a day out in nature of silence and solitude.

But there are times when we trickle into places/behaviors that aren’t healthy. While they might feel good in the moment, they leave you drained and robbed of true recovery. Avoid these 3 places when searching for mental clarity, recovery and peace:

1. Gossip

Gossip can feel nice when it’s coming out of your mouth or when you are listening to other people gossip. Someone might think, “It’s nice to release my feelings every now and again.” It’s my opinion that it was designed to feel that way.

It’s designed to be deceptive. Initially you have that good, warm feeling when doing it, but later these thoughts do weigh on you. You are constantly thinking about those who you are gossiping about. You apply their life to any situation you encounter,  weighing how and why they would fail at a certain task. Eventually your gossip consumes you and can become your identity. Anytime you’re around certain people, your conversation immediately can turn to what everyone else is doing instead of building any quality relationship equity.

The bible says that a gossiper’s tongue is like that of an asp whose throat is an open grave and whose words lead to death! That rings true today. There are two ways you can work hard in your life to be the best person you can be. You can do it by working hard, loving hard and play hard. That leads to you being recognized for your work. The other way to be the best is by tearing everyone else down. It might work in your mind, but it’s an unhealthy, all-consuming method.

[shareable]You can be the best by working hard, or you can be the best by tearing everyone down around you. [/shareable]

You can never ‘rest’ amongst gossip. It’s a method to lull you to sleep so you become consumed in it.

 2. Avoidance

 This is where you decide that with everything on your plate, you are going to run away and try to forget about it all. If you’ve ever done this and have the ability to forget anything that’s not in front of you, you might know this strategy works for a little bit. But sooner or later you need to return from your vacation or retreat and guess what? There’s an even bigger pile of work waiting on your desk.

Avoiding vital work for rest is like avoiding surgery with a broken leg. It doesn’t heal the problem, in fact, it usually makes things worse.

[shareable]Avoiding vital work for rest is like avoiding surgery with a broken leg[/shareable]

Haven’t you seen the people that escape their job because they are burned out? What happens when they come back? They are swimming in more work. Pretty soon they are taking longer and longer vacations every year, trying the escape the increasing pile of tasks on their desk.

Now, what i’m NOT saying is that you shouldn’t vacation or take breaks. I’m saying that if you are using the word vacation as synonym a for avoidance or procrastination, you can’t reap the full benefits of your break. In other words: your mind cannot find peace through avoidance.

Try this instead: Delegate. Give away work to others to ease your burden. One person cannot tackle the world, and you aren’t always the best person for every job.

Here’s another idea: Say No. You cannot help every situation. Keep your schedules manageable, not overloaded because we don’t know how to politely decline.

3. Pornography

Here me out on this one.

Some view porn as a break from reality to take your mind off of life. If only that were the case. Like the other two on this list, these are addictive behaviors that are seemingly innocuous. Ultimately they lead to absorbing more of your time, and more of your mental capacity. You can begin to become consumed by porn and pretty soon you have a monthly habit, then a weekly habit, then a daily habit.

True mental rejuvenation needs wholesome, spiritual relaxation or fun. Being with family, seeing a new place or reading a good book are good examples. These things give to your soul while pornography robs you of true joy and peace. You harm the people you watch by robbing them of their humanity and dignity and you hurt the people around you like your spouse, parents or kids.

Finally, i’d say, when does it end? When will you stop? When you are mentally healthy? When you aren’t so stressed? When you get older or married? Without an intentional and serious intervention you won’t stop and you’ll never rest.

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